Let's Talk About 'Transformation Tuesdays'... The 3 Other Transformations

I realise that today is a Wednesday, and perhaps it would have been more apt to post this blog a day ago, or in 6 days time, but today's blog is completely spontaneous and based on a brief observation I made when I glanced upon my Instagram 'explore' page.

What I saw today was a post of this beautiful woman. Slim, strong, athletic and amazing. She looked absolutely INSANE... and that was just her 'before' photo. Her after photo showed an even slimmer girl, even stronger, more athletic... a little more amazing.

I definitely was not the only one who had noticed this. The comments were overflowing with praise, compliments and support. 'Awesome transformation.' 'Amazing'. 'Wow, this is motivation'. This was a beautiful thing to see - women supporting other women, mutual support, love, girl power!!! However, among all this, two other comments caught my attention...

1) 'I think I look more like photo one and it makes me think... should I go to the gym too and lose some weight, maybe I am chubby. Other girls often think the same'.

2) 'To any girl who sees this on their explore page - it is ok if you do not look like the girl on the right. It is definitely ok if you do not even look like the girl on the left. It is absolutely fine if you do not enjoy working out. What is not fine is feeling bad about yourself after seeing fitness pages pop up on your news feed. Everyone is different, everyone is beautiful. Whether we work out, whether we eat fast food or organic food, whether we are tall, short, thin or chubby. Everyone is perfect the way they are'.

I do not want to create a controversial blog post. I do not to say that any of these comments were right or wrong - because none of these comments are. I especially do not want to say that this girl should not post about her lifestyle, because she should - and girlie I see you and your aesthetically pleasing abs... you keep going, keep on doing you! But I do think there are some things we need to discuss about transformation Tuesdays...

The term 'transformation' is such an ambiguous term. What we see on our Instagram feeds is merely the physical component of the transformation. However, there are so many other aspects that go along with the transformation. What goes with the perfect new physique that you are staring at is a change so much greater than your eyes can perceive. Hours of training or exercise, which for some may have involved training themselves to love, or even tolerate, that exercise. Change to lifestyle factors - saying no to their favourite dinner or dessert once more often than they did before. Banishing the burgers, cutting the chips. We definitely should praise these people. It IS NOT easy to get up, get going and not have the incentive of our favourite comfort food waiting for us on a cool autumn evening. These are all things that, in my opinion, go alongside a transformation, and this is what I want to talk about today. I'll use the example of myself, for demonstration purposes. but please be kind, because this makes me kind of nervous and vulnerable, but here goes nothing...

This is a photo of me, arguably at the fittest I have ever been in my life. I could run a 5K without much effort, I ate broccoli at least 6 days of the week (to be fair, I still do, I just really like broccoli), the only clothes I really wore other than my gym wear was my work uniform (and I probably would have worn them even there if I could have)!

Sometime around March 2015 I, at the age of 18, went on the first ever diet of my life. I suppose I was quite lucky to get even that far without feeling the burden of what it meant to gain an extra pound, or having never worried about upgrading my meal to a king size. I perceived my size 8 - 10 frame as good enough. Then, almost out of nowhere, one day it wasn't enough anymore. Somehow I suddenly caught this bug of wanting to be a better version of myself, so that's what I did. For the first time in my life I bought myself a gym membership, took control of my own cooking so I could pay just a little more attention to the things I ate, and my own journey began.

I had fun! I had always loved to cook - so swapping cheesed stuffed chicken wrapped in bacon for healthy stir fries or fish and cous-cous concoctions was no problem. I enjoyed exploring. I loved the exercise too. My best friend was my fitness partner and we had so much fun, laughing our way through running, giggling our way through rowing, smiling through the sit ups.

I saw changes quickly. The bigger sizes in my wardrobe rapidly became obsolete very. By our girls holiday that June I comfortably fit into size 6s of retailers that I had previously deemed 'very ungenerous' with their clothes sizing. I was thin, I was healthy and I was happy. And I was proud of myself... because I had made myself a promise and I had seen it through. I had put in the work and I had seen the progress.

But here is where the problems came. Here's where the transformation becomes more than just physical. I knew how to get thin, how to get fit. I did not know how to maintain it. I knew that, to become this new version of myself, I had to move more, eat less (or, if not necessarily less, at least different). What I had learned over those few short months was a whole new lifestyle, a whole new mind set. I had created this new person almost entirely.

Of course I wanted to maintain my new self, I had put in all that hard work and graft, but I knew nothing of maintenance, only of change... and that's what continued to happen. I simply continued in my ways with all the new habits I had formed - exercise at the gym at least 3 times a week, control portion sizes, don't eat out too often, don't have the chocolate bar today, don't forget the calories in alcohol too. So my body continued to change and what I had forgotten was that these were the habits that had been used with the intention to diet. But here was my dilemma. I only knew of my previous lifestyle, which would revert me back to my former self, undo all my hard work, OR my new lifestyle, which was the consequence of dieting behaviour, but was 'on the safe side'.

What had happened to me, along with my physical transformations, was a whole load of other transformations that I had not even noticed running up alongside me.

1) A cognitive transformation - The way I thought about the things I ate, a sudden categorisation of foods that were acceptable for everyday and foods that were acceptable for some days. A mind set I had been exempt from before. The way I thought about exercise and its need to be incorporated into everyday of my life. I had a whole new love of exercise, which, upon reflection could have been for two reasons. Firstly, I had never really given myself the opportunity to explore exercise before (simply because I had always been told I wasn't the 'sporty' type). By exploring something new I found a new love. Alternatively, my love of exercise may have been the result of conditioning. A consequence of a love that was evoked by loving the changes I saw in myself and not being able to separate the two. My mindset, my cognitions, to so many aspects of my life had changed alongside my dress size.

2) A lifestyle transformation - The things I could and could not do. A weekly trip to an ice cream parlour, an twice a week drinking session with a greasy takeaway to celebrate making it to the early hours of the morning, fortnightly takeaway night. I had been cutting these things out for so long, I took for granted not to do them anymore.  My new abs brought with them new habits. This has been functional to helping with a diet, but it wasn't functional to my everyday life.

3) Treatment transformation - The way people treated me. Sometimes this made me very uncomfortable. People had pointed out I lost weight, how good I looked - they were complimenting me but I did not know whether to perceive it as an insult... had I not looked good before? I only ever set out to make minor improvements, small alterations, a little bit of editing. This only made me more self-conscious to not return to the way I had been before. A few people pointed out 'how good I was at eating' - as if there was a way to be bad at eating, like it is not just something we do to survive, like I was eating my ham and lettuce sandwich, apple and banana not out of enjoyment for those foods but for some other reason, when I had given up my intention to diet long ago.

So these things held hands and stood there alongside my physical transformation. Had I had used the #transformationtuesday hashtag at this point, I might have know that I wasn't just referring to my toned body. So many other things had changed... There's sometimes so much more to a transformation Tuesday that you can even know with one quick look. And while some of the transformations I had made were making me happy, others were not, and they had to change regardless of the other changes that may make as a knock on effect.

All of the above is why I have carefully chosen those two comments to discuss today.

Comment number one resounded with me because I know what it's like to feel like your 'before' was not good enough. I was always careful not to post a before and after post. Partly, because I felt like my 'before' did not matter, I was quite content and preoccupied with my present self. But to some people, your before is THEIR goal, and I think we all need to be mindful of that. I think this is the small issue with #transformationtuesdays and perhaps, instead, fitness bloggers, food bloggers and all instagram users alike should instead opt for a hashtag like #celebrationsaturday.

#CelebrationSaturday - where we all just post a bad ass, sexy selfie of ourselves as we currently are. Maybe because that's the consequence of a change we worked damn hard for, or because we have the strength to love ourselves exactly how we are today, right here, right now... and to know that both is fine... if you're good enough for you, then you're good enough for me too, but the former is ALWAYS more important.

It took me a really long while to shake peoples' comments, they created an imaginary fear of being like the girl I once knew. 'Oh my goodness, you're so skinny now'. (I met the criteria of a typically 'skinny person before). 'Oh wow, you look SO good'. (I didn't know I didn't before - but thanks for telling me). 'WOW, you look incredibly healthy'. (Eating my Mum's hearty home-cooked dinner's was healthy too, my mindset before was happy and healthy too, and as far as I am aware - I had no critical or lifestyle disadvantaging conditions then either). I LIKED the girl I once knew. Yes, I was proud of the girl who could run a 5K, or jog for an hour without stopping... but I was also very impressed by the girl who could out eat almost any guy at a burger restaurant, whose Sunday roast dinner portions were as big as her two brothers.

My point here is about compromise. Make sure that you're EVERY version of yourself that you like. The greatest extremes of my transformation left me cutting out factors of my life that I did not enjoy, not doing things because I felt like I could not do them. So I do not look EXACTLY like the girl in the photograph now... but I look close enough, and I'm twice as happy as she is! Do not let one transformation dictate another, one that you do not necessarily want to make.

(The above photo is my current situation. Today has been a prime example of a day I couldn't and wouldn't want to go to the gym because I am busy studying, rather than squatting. Both days would have been days well spent, but balance is key - and I also enjoy books and biscuits)!

I want to address the second comment I referred to now. It actually spoke to me so loudly that I felt compelled to message this young woman, a totally stranger, to tell her how I felt about her comment. How truly RIGHT she is! If you look like the woman in the transformation photo that is great, if you look like the woman in her before photo that is great, if you look like the person in the photo you just took of you damn self - EVEN BETTER, you look GREAT!

You look your best when you're doing you, being you. If you don't work out, that IS fine. There was a stage when I felt guilty, LAZY, for not completing my weekly workouts. I personally cannot stand these 'what's your excuse' campaigns. Work out when 1) you have time, 2) when you do not have other priorities, 3) when you actually feel like it and think 'hey, that would be fun and I would enjoy doing that with my time today'! Here's a whole bunch of valid excuses for not working out today - I had to study, I had to work, there was a book I was enthralled by, I had to take care of the children, I had to take care of ANYONE, I was busy taking care if myself, I am sick, I am too tired, I had family issues, I just want to spend quality time with my family, I had other priorities, I just don't feel like it today, I absolutely HATE exercise.

My exercise this week might entail an outdoor run, because I'm the girl who enjoys nature. If I go to the gym my primary goal will probably be to laugh with my best friend until my stomach hurts and not stay there until my tummy is more toned. Do it if you ENJOY it. Here's something that always makes me laugh - they say you will live a longer life if you spend more time exercising, but what if that extra time is just the time you invested into exercising (and if you really, truly didn't like it) then what's the point? I get it probably doesn't work out exactly, just a funny thought...

Whatever you eat is fine. I am never going to eat avocado on toast in order to 'be healthier' because I DO NOT LIKE avocado... and if I don't feel happy about what I just ate, I am probably going to eat something else. Eat a carrot, eat a chocolate bar, have a banana or a burger. It doesn't matter.

What you do in your free time is fine. Climb a mountain, run laps, read a book, invest in your favourite TV series. The healthiest thing you can do is enrich your beautiful mind and whichever one of the above gets your brain ticking... DO IT MORE! 'To be healthy as a whole, mental wellness plays a role'.

However you look is MORE than fine. In fact, you look great. Apparently the average clothes size for a woman in the UK is 16. The year is 2016 - why does that mean ANYTHING? Average is such a social construct these days that if somebody asked you to describe 'average' what would it even mean? Besides, 90% of us spend our whole lives trying to be something other than average anyway. AND on that note, who on Earth thought that they could take people, beautiful, rich in personality and life individuals, and start describing them with a number, with quantitative data. I'm sorry, but the label doesn't fit if you do not want to wear it.

I know this blog post is lengthy. So if you're still reading thank you. I feel like we've shared a lot and I appreciate you listening to both my personal story and my rant. I'm nearly done now, I promise...

(Also, if you're skim reading this blog or want a condensed version this is probably the bit you should jump to).

I don't think we should completely abolish #transformationtuesday but I think we should all be real about it. Let's discuss the changes we made to get there. The pros and the cons. All the transformations we made. Maybe we look damn good today, but we're super sad because we didn't get cheese and bacon on our chips when we really wanted to.

Let's celebrate our transformations when they're where we want to be - physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually... everything from our crunches in the gym to crunching down on that extra tasty pizza. Let's praise the people who have transformed themselves and their lives to get where they want to be, BUT let's not forget to praise the people who learned the magic behind accepting themselves exactly the way they are because they are already good enough (it's an incredible skill, you know)... something some of us are still yet to learn, something that, even at my 'physical best' I still had not done, I still had a bigger transformation to make.

Let's praise transformations beyond what we can physically see - the girl or boys who transformed themselves and applied themselves to their studies, or gave back to the community and wanted to change the world, to the people who have overcome formed maladaptive or dysfunctional mind sets and become better people or just got themselves to exactly where they need to be...

Let's have a #celebrationsaturday where, gym wear or pyjamas, trainers or high heels, grapes or galaxy bars, squats or story books, we all just love exactly who we are, exactly where we are right now - because we've changed for the better, or because we've always been the same, and, because whether you're the former or the latter - you're good enough right now, you ALWAYS have been, and you sure as hell always will be.

Create the life you want to live and the you that you want to be. Take care of you. Don't change what is not broken. 

3 Things That Come Free With A Plane Ticket

Do you ever just feel so inspired, so excited that you cannot sleep?

It's currently 5:15 am. I am not awake for the above reason. I am awake and alert simply because I am. However, what has come to mind at this ghastly hour, as I scroll through my Instagram feed, vigorously stalking photos of beautiful African safaris, tropical bohemian beaches and stunning snippets of the Atlantic Ocean, is how inspired I feel every time I travel. On my most recent trip to the Canary Islands, I recall the feeling of waking up far too prematurely but being unable to coax myself into falling back to sleep, simply because the promise of the upcoming day was so unbelievably exciting. As much as I enjoy a good night's sleep, the promise of actively living out my dreams was enough to tempt me away from the comforts of my bed.

So, that's what I want to talk about now, at 5:15 am. The ways in which travelling is inspirational and exciting. The 3 things that come free with a plane ticket...

1) INSPIRATION

(This was an obvious starting point).

Something above travelling make me feel inspired from the word go. Everything about it excites every part of me!

From the moment the airplane takes off I think to myself - 'who was the person sat here before me, where did they go, what stories and memories did they create'? I feel inspired by the beautiful previews of the world that the journey to the destination reveals, by the conversations of similar strangers regarding their own forthcoming journeys, by the photographs and the stories in the airline's travel magazine, which I occupy myself with for the hours that I wish would hurry by on the plane.

Arriving at my destination only evokes further inspiration - fascination with new places, new cultures, new cuisines... a whole new world... and the concept that this is only a new world to me and yet so familiar to another person. That my today is somebody else's everyday. I could preach about this forever - but to avoid a mini-novel on travelling and inspiration I will simply summarise by saying that I wholeheartedly believe feeling inspired is one of the greatest blessings travelling offers. And I am in love with the hope it fills you with for the future - that if there is this one beautiful place that is begging to be explored, there will always be one more. Cue endless inspiration!

2) CLARITY

I truly feel travelling gives you such a strong sense of what is important.

From carefully selecting and prioritising the items to take with you, making cuts and sacrifices as if you might have to live out of a 3 foot suitcase for the rest of eternity. From the people you choose to travel with, knowing that for the next few days, weeks or months they will be the only familiar face that you see each and every day. From the places you select to travel, carefully choosing them because you need to feel the sun on your skin or the rush of wind through your hair as you fly down a ski slope. For the reasons you choose to travel there - for the love of fascinating people, or curiosity about creatures, or searching for stunning scenes.

It gives you clarity in the sense that it reveals to you what is important to you, what you really need in this life.

For me personally, inspiration and clarity walk hand in hand. I have heard some people argue that travelling reminds you that you are small, somehow insignificant to the larger things in life, a minuscule part of the gigantic world. But I disagree.

On our most recent trip, I recall one conversation which I shared with my boyfriend on the balcony of out hotel room one night. We enjoy the sunset. We watched the mountains disappear into the darkness, before the lights of the night painted the town. I thought to myself - what a beautiful world that I am a witness of right now! I felt so blessed, that of all the eyes in the world, it was my eyes that were fortunate enough to watch this scene unfold. I sat there and thought to myself, 'just because another person's eyes are not observing this same view right now, it doesn't cease to exist or make it any less real and relevant'.

That's how travelling makes ME feel - that, in this life, you may not always be seen, or noticed. Sometimes you may be hidden away, at other times you may be lighting up or painting the town. You may not always be relevant to everyone, but you are very important to someone. To someone you are not a small part of the world, you are the whole word, centre of the scene...

The above point may appear to be the ramblings of a mad woman to one person, and another person may total relate. That's the thing about clarity, it is YOUR clarity. It puts things into perspective for you and inspires (see how that comes up time and time again) some of the most thought provoking but clear feelings and perspectives of your life.

3) FREEDOM

Airplanes literally make me feel like a bird... and not just because they shoot me high into the sky! Even from that very early stage of embarking on my trip, I feel free. It's incredible. From the aircraft, you literally watch you daily life become smaller and smaller still, as you temporarily escape from everyday reality... YOU. ARE. FREE.

Travelling lets you know who you are and the things you love to do when you wake up in the morning and think 'today I am not constrained by life or commitment or routine, and I can do whatever, be whatever... so what shall I do with my life today?' 'Perhaps I'll climb a mountain, or dive head first into the ocean'. It's a beautiful freedom that permits you to take the time you need to familiarise yourself with yourself, to seize opportunities, to create memories that will form the basis of your favourite stories... simply because you are free to do so!

Sometimes a plane ticket may not be cheap, but at they same time, it is priceless. Some very intelligent person once said "travelling is the only thing you buy that makes you richer". I cannot help but agree. I do not believe that there is anything that makes you feel wealthier than the thoughts and feelings that travelling and exploring this beautiful world arouses.

Have a happy weekend everyone...

And if you're feel inspired, go book a plane ticket somewhere, anywhere, everywhere. (It's the perfect time of year of last minute deals too). You'll never regret it. Honest...

https://www.skyscanner.net/

5 Reasons Why Baking Pretty Much Sums Up Life!

The time as I look at the clock right now is 6:10am and  I have already been up a while. I am sat in my bed with my first coffee of the day - black, because I need all the caffeine I can get at this time of the morning and on this little sleep (let's block those Adenosine receptors) and slightly frothy thanks to the beautiful invention that is my coffee frother. As I sit here, I am contemplating yesterday's antics. I accidentally spent 8 hours baking.

Firstly, you may wonder what kind of person gets up and immediately starts thinking about cake. Well, that would be me, because cake it awesome... and also, coffee goes perfectly with cake - just not at 6am. Secondly, you may wonder how you 'accidentally' spend 8 hours baking. In summary, what was intended to take a few hours to make two big cakes, a reasonable size batch of cupcakes and experiment with making some mini cheesecakes for the first time took a little bit longer than expected. But this has just got me thinking about how baking (and cakes) is essentially just life life. Sometimes (like in the instance of yesterday) you go off course and thinking turn out differently or take longer than expected, but you always seem to get there in the end. So here's a few reasons why baking pretty much sums up life (featuring a pretty picture of my BIG baking session yesterday)!

From left to right: Red velvet cake, mini cheesecakes, white chocolate chip cupcakes. chocolate fudge cake, vanilla cupcakes with chocolate fudge icing.

1) Life is not just one, simple thing. It is many things. Just like how a cake is sugar, flour, egg and more. It is more than one simple element. Some of these elements you may like more than others (of course we would all rather eat a bag of sugar than an egg - unless it's nice, and poached, and on toast... mmm). However, sometimes, when all the different elements come together in the right quantities, they create something beautiful - so embrace all the elements or ingredients of life!

Red velvet cake with extra colour!

2) You have got to mix it up! You cannot just leave the ingredients sat there in the bowl, the eggs un-whisked, the mix un-stirred. Mix it up every once in a while - because that's what you're suppose to do. Or you will sit there and stay the same and never create anything beautiful. 

Vanilla cupcakes with chocolate fudge icing (and lots of smarties and colour)!

3) You will rise... and sometimes you will fall. There is nothing more satisfying than sitting like a small excited child, right next to the oven door, and watching your cake double in size, while it's beautiful odours fill the kitchen as if you were in Hansel and Gretel's bakery. And watching your cake rise comes with a feeling of accomplishment, success. We all love to rise and be our best - and rightly so! But sometimes, like the occasional cake, we will fall. We won't rise. It is impossible to have a 100% success rate and that's ok. Sometimes you won't have done anything wrong, or you'll make a minor error, forget a vital ingredient, skip a step, and things won't work out - but that's ok. It happens. You'll rise next time!

Chocolate fudge flower cake.

4) Things do not always go as planned or expected. Sometimes a 3 hour baking sessions takes nearly three times as long. Sometimes you made more cake mix than expected so, rather than throwing it away, you decide to make twice as many cakes. Sometimes the buttercream won't co-operate but you are going to stand there until it does anyway... and suddenly a whole day has done by and your kitchen is obliterated and you cannot feel you fingers anymore (it wasn't all bad... honestly)! In life, we go off course. We set our sights on something and sometimes it takes twice as long. Sometimes we cannot make something work, no matter how hard we try. Sometimes we see a picture or we have one in mind, and no matter what we do, we cannot make things match this image that we have. We make messess... we clean them up. Things go wrong... we work to fix them. Things take time... we make time. We encounter minor hiccups or big obstacles... so we try climb on over them. Things won't always go our way... but sometimes they do... and then it's incredible!

Mini cheesecakes (which turned out pretty well, for a kitchen experiment).

5) It is not always pretty, but it's still cake... I mean life. I hate to say it, but sometimes when it isn't pretty and it's all going wrong, that's 'just life'. And even when the cake is sat there on the side, undecorated, slightly at an angle, missing a chunk because you got ravenously hungy and the heavenly fragrances of your homely bakery just got too much - it's STILL cake! So, when you think about it, even when it is not perfect, it's still a cake - and cake is NEVER bad (all cakes are beautiful!!!). So let's apply that to life. Even when life isn't perfect, it's still not that bad. 

Just a couple of cakes.

Keep on persevering and creating! 

Notebook: All of these cakes were made to support a fundraiser for Macmillan. Every September they run a coffee morning fundraiser. We are doing ours slightly early this year in memory of a lovely colleague and friend we recently lost at work. So, to anyone who is not already doing the event, get involved, get creative. Get out your ingredients and make those cakes. No matter how small, tall, wonky, chunky or funky. Bake, bake, bake. 1) It's for a great cause. 2) It is more than acceptable to eat 20+ cupcakes for a great cause. 3) It's SEPTEMBER (hello autumn), so goodbye Summer bodies... we're all going to need that winter layer... CAKE, CAKE, CAKE!

10 Things I Learned in Bali

Ok, so I have accidentally been a little bit slower than I intended in starting my blog. Sometimes life just decides you are just going to be really, frantically busy for a while. So let's rewind...

One month ago today I completed my final voluntary project in Bali, Indonesia. I spent a month working abroad where I helped with mental health, special needs and English teaching. The experience was absolutely incredible and saying that it ended a month ago seems surreal. However, even though the trip experience may have ended, I have memories to last me a life time, and that's what I want to discuss today. So, out in the beautiful island of Bali, with people I had never met prior to my trip, approximately 7,800 miles from home and out of my comfort zone, here are some of the thing that I learned. 

1) Do things that give you life long memories! All the hard-work, the graft and the occasional bad stuff, that may not be a nice feeling right now but that's temporary and feelings cannot last forever. Memories, however, can. So go and completely immerse yourself. Somewhere, anywhere, or into something, anything.For me, all the hard-work that had gone into being able to volunteer abroad was more than justified when I watched the smiles of the local children I played games with in the street or as I looked up to the trees of the jungle from my water raft. There are some moments your life that are truly special and surreal - but to acquire them you need to put yourself out there!

2) One person CAN make a difference. What does it matter if it is on a small scale or a large scale? Happiness is completing a project and seeing a child smile, or press your hand to their forehead as a sign of respect. I don't think I have ever felt a greater sense of purpose in my life, so far, as when I completed a project out there and felt I had made an impact on someone's life, or even somebody's day. Even beyond this, I met some incredible people on my trip and we were their a long time together, all far from home. Friendships and bonds were as inevitable as the hard times that was occasionally experiences. What makes a difference to these hard-times if the things one person does for another, or says to another. One person CAN makes a difference. They can positively impact upon another person, who in turn can make a difference to somebody else and suddenly you have this beautiful chain reaction.

3) Be flexible! Try something new! You might not love it, but at least you will have tried it. Trying something at least gives you an opinion on it, a new view. And experiences and like experiments, they come to be a source of knowledge to. Bali meant being flexible everyday. From my daily routine, to the things I tried to eat, to everything I did and saw.  Adaptation is a powerful skill. P.S - things that are more flexible are less likely to break, they merely bend and bounce back instead.

4) BE YOURSELF! And be whatever version of yourself you feel like being that day, because we all have more than one version of ourselves, play more than one role. Life is too short to waste time trying to exhaust yourself by playing the role of someone you are not. 

5) Give - but it's ok to take too. A very smart lady in Bali told me that "People call each other selfish like it's an insult, but it is not always selfish to put oneself first, it's good for you sometimes and healthy. We should not be afraid or insulted to be called selfish". She made a very good point. By no means do I think you should spend all 24 hours of the day thinking of yourself and only yourself, but it's ok to thing of yourself sometimes too. To put oneself's first and close others a very close second, because ultimate, you have to live for you. To give a little and to take a little is fair, it is balances, like scales... and good balance stops you from falling. So give, give, give. So out there and make a difference. But treat yourself too, allow yourself a little something back. Share and care but take, make and create!

6) Some people in life give and forgive, some people will get and forget. This is not unalike point 5. A lot has gone on in my person life the last 6 months and I think I have spent a lot of time upset with people who have let me down, especially the people I felt I had given so much to in the past. However, and as much as I loathe this expression, 'that's the way life is' sometimes. Some people just get and forget. But you should aspire to rise above this. Keep on giving and forgiving. It can be easy to get caught up and become resentful of other peoples wrong-doings. We all have 'what's the point' or 'who would do the same for me?' moments, but work past these. It's good to be an above average person! Keep on giving - be it your resources, knowledge or time. And forgive those who don't do the same, you never know what you might teach them along the way.

7) The world is a big and beautiful place, but you have to keep your eyes, your mind and your heart open to see it. The world IS an incredible place. The more channels you keep open, the more of it you can let it. See it with your eyes because it is beautiful. Open your mind because the world is full of differences and they are exciting and we can learn from them. Keep your heart open too - that's what helps intertwine the moments and memories with the feelings. 

8) BE BRAVE! Sometimes we want to do things, and we don't for silly reasons. This speak true of the younger version of myself so, so much. As a young, shy girl in class I recall wanting to answer the question but being too afraid to put my hand up. sometimes we want to say something, and speak up, but the words just won't come. Or we want to do something but we fear the consequences. I think that sometimes we crave to be brave. It's as if we are standing on the edge of a cliff, wanting to jump and experience the free fall, but we are standing, waiting for someone to push us because we cannot quite take the leap of faith ourselves. Sometimes we have to just DO IT, be brave - or regret it all the way to be brave. Here's what I found - it gets easier each time too. The more times you step out of your comfort zone, the more it actually stops being 'out of' your comfort zone and starts becoming a commonplace. SO BE BRAVE! 

9) The biggest journey you will ever have is your own life. Cliche, I know! It's all be said before, but it's true. But on all great journeys you make discoveries and the greatest discovery you will ever make is yourself! So enjoy your journey! 

10) Always be open to friendship. I have decided that friendship is one of the most beautiful things that was are blessed to experience in our lifetimes. Some friendships may be lifelong, while other friendships may just contribute to lifelong memories. And both is fine because both enrich you in some way. I met a lot of incredible people in Bali and I feel so incredibly humbled and blessed to have had this opportunity. You should always be open to a new friendship, there's no such thing as too many. A month later I still talk to some of these amazing people everyday, while others I speak to on rare occasions - and this probably resounds for many people with their friends in their everyday life. Both is fine. Friends, when absent, stay in our thoughts, our memories and our hearts and they are a big, big part of both who we are and are experiences. So makes lots, have lots - because this means lots of experiences and lots of extra elements to ourselves. Friendship is partly such as incredible thing because of how it can both blossom and survive in any conditions!

Beginning to Blog

As a child, almost every birthday and every Christmas I would be given some form of new diary / journal / notepad. These blank books were probably some of my favourite gifts ever and in the weeks and months that would follow, I would fill those miniature books with all of the ramblings that came straight from the mind of the younger version of myself. Blank pages became stories and secrets, moments and memories, and with a little amount of time, an empty journal evolved into a small novel.

I always adored this process as a young girl. Just watching my words fill page after page, recording my thoughts and feelings somewhere safe, so that once they had passed with the moment that they existed within, there was still some evidence of them left behind. I always hoped that one day I would fill one of my journals with an incredible story, that I would have some extraordinary tale to tell. So I would wait and wonder when I would document this epic story. However, what has occurred to me since those days, is that if you still and wait for the events to unfold, what you have is an ending and you have omitted the story. Life's big moments are built on the foundations of all the smaller stepping stone moments.

There are many things we forget about our childhood, sometimes we choose to forget, sometimes we forget accidentally. It is quite easily to grow and to forget the things that brought happiness to your youth. I had forgotten my love of writing and story telling until a short while ago.

On my 20th Birthday, my best friend had me feeling like the 8 year old version of myself again when she gave me an empty journal as a gift. Just like the littler version of myself, I felt the same feelings of excitement over the gift and the same anticipation about what stories and words that journal would come to hold in due time.

So recently, this journal, travelled more than 7,000 miles around the world with me and fulfilled its purpose of becoming the official document of all the ramblings that came straight from the mind of the present version of myself. And every time I wrote an entry in that book, I felt that same youthful enjoyment I did for all those years as a child. I enjoyed all the time I spent processing my thoughts as I transferred them from my brain to my book, I adored playing with words as if they were a construction toy and I was building and creating something exciting and new. It was like falling in love for a second time.

Since I have completed this journal I have bought more to continue to write and fill, but it has also inspired me to take the plunge and begin blogging. I have always had this conception that to be able to blog you need to be an extremely interesting person, who lives an exotic lifestyle and is immensely fascinating and appealing to all other human beings. That may well be true in some instances. But, I am hoping, you can also be a relatively good, or at least moderately interesting, at blogging if you have an original thought and an inspiring story, or little stories, to tell.

So here goes nothing. Welcome to my blog...